Lalalalalalala…TMI

You've had this conversation with someone, where you get to the point of no return and they share just a bit more than you EVER wanted to know about them. And that point is different based on your relationship and closeness. You can handle a girlfriend's angst over a sticky situation if you know you don't have a lot of face time with her hapless spouse, but it's a whole new kettle of fishwhen it's family.

I, personally, can hash out any thing with my sister and my best friend Kelly.They are my go-to team, sparing the ladies at church with the real quandrys of life from my perspective.

But someone had the need for prayer-n-share sunday night and I was NOT ready for what I heard. Can't say as I'd EVER be ready for this convo, on either side of heaven.

My mother has a boyfriend. His name is Ralph.

Now sure, it's been almost 2 years since my dad passed away, and if you've spent any real time with my mom you know she's been hunting for this particular duck for awhile now.

And I've heard far too much information on this subject in it's planning stages, mom always had this need for TMI when I was a younger woman, a girl just does not NEED to know about her folks' private life. She's even shared a few things with our priests (in public) that would make ya blush. Gotta love this new chapter starring dementia.

But I gotta tell ya: giving dating advice to the demented is not for the faint of heart.

A few things I NEVER thought I'd say to MY mother:
(and as a matter of christian charity I will omit the replies)

" I know he likes to kiss and hold hands, but…"

"Dating advice when you are young is that you should see ALL the seasons with someone before marrying but maybe YOU should know someone for MORE than a week …"

" How do YOU know his scar branches there?" (I did not wait for a reply)

" You do know you can still get a REPUTATION (not to mention a disease) in an assisted living facility"

"one foot on the floor at all times, young lady"

"most spirit-filled men I know wouldn't make that request."
(filled with WHAT spirit is all I could think)

"the bible does not suspend the rules once you reach 80."

I'm spent the day monday with my seared eardrums healing, and me pondering life. She's "happy" or at least distracted. She's not the first woman on the planet to revert to 13 concerning a man, nor will she be the last. There has to be some extreme category of mercy in God's play-book for those people with brain injuries. And it's not as though I didn't have some hint of this possibility. But why me?

Oh, my…

Look for the possible sequels:
• planning a wedding for the demented
• the demented guide to broken hearts